


Genius and Gemini

by Pyreclaws



Category: Borderlands
Genre: Alien Biology, I should probably tag this as cloaca sex too if that's the right term, M/M, Threesome, and another Zer0, four-eyed Zer0, it sounds scarier than it actually is, long story short: eridium is wild shit, mandibles being used for kissing, merry christmas you filthy animals, pseudo-knotting?, vibrator use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-10
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-05-05 22:51:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5393222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pyreclaws/pseuds/Pyreclaws
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zer0 would love it if Axton stopped telling everyone under the sun about their sexual encounters. But if it keeps fulfilling his kinks, why would he stop?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Genius and Gemini

**Author's Note:**

  * For [finefishass](https://archiveofourown.org/users/finefishass/gifts).



Five sharp knocks, and the happy whistling of an expectant soldier.

Zer0 sighed. Axton was at his door again.

"Hey, sweetheart, thought up a proposal you might like!" Axton called, his voice probably carrying across half of Sanctuary. "I know you're into some kinky shit, kid, or at least I am, so if you wanna hear it--!"

Zer0 ran to his door and nearly ripped it off its hinges trying to get it to open and Axton's mouth to close.

"Do not bring this up. You're speaking much too loudly, everyone will know." Blush lines shone in front of Zer0's helmet screen, highlighting his already unzipped armor and glinting on his pale three-fingered hands.

"Whoa, you up to some shit without me in there, buddy?" Axton whistled, beaming at Zer0's disheveled outfit.

"Napping, if you must know," Zer0 confessed.

"And you threw on a whole bodysuit just to see little ol' me? I'm not sure whether to be flattered or offended. You know I'm just going to take it back off of you. With my teeth." Axton smiled, still speaking so loudly that Zer0 was sure he heard the guards outside groaning.

"Just get inside, please, before you embarrass me. Any more, I mean." Zer0 threw the door open beside him, and grabbed Axton by the shirt. He wrenched Axton inside, and slammed the door closed with a clunk, then the sound of the lock spinning pneumatically into place.

Axton slammed his foot down to catch himself. "Oh thank god, I thought it was going to be much harder to get in here," he snorted. "I was gonna recount our last encounter in great detail if you didn't hurry up. You know, the time when we--"

"Yes, yes, I was there. Shut up." Zer0 crossed his arms, the effect ruined by the four red diagonal lines that seemed permanently affixed to his face screen whenever Axton was around.

"So, babe, listen, I was thinkin', you got that cool thing you do on the battlefield, yeah?" Axton tried to stammer out, suddenly also red. He backed up a few steps until his legs ran into Zer0's bed, and he sat heavily. "You can do, the, you know..." He waved his arms around as if wielding a sword, albeit badly.

"I will not approve of swordplay in bed," Zer0 said.

Axton took a minute to put his arms down, laughing. "No, no, I mean, there's two of you sometimes, one with the sword, and you stealth up, and, babe, two of you - two! I'd do anything, babe, anything..."

"You wish me to show my battle skills as a form of foreplay," Zer0 stated, nonplussed.

"No no no," Axton shook his head, then thought better of it and nodded. "Well yes, you could probably suplex me into bed and I'd ride your dick like a stallion, but I meant...well, it would be super hot if you could, well, if there were two of you."

"In bed," Zer0 supplied, voice devoid of all surprise.

"Yes. Two naked, begging Zer0s, fighting over my dick, damn..."

"I have no reason to fight with a hologram." Zer0 silently zipped up his jumpsuit and picked up his gloves.

"Please, sweetheart, delicious alien dearest, pumpkin pie, I don't care if I have to grovel--"

"It would not hurt," Zer0 said.

Axton immediately dropped to his knees. "Come on, just this one time, I just gotta try it before I die, which is looking more likely by the day, so please just let me do this one time, I'll make sure you like it."

Zer0 sighed. And then, almost immediately, turned and left. The lock twisted open, the door slid to the side, and Zer0 took off running. He flashed a heart emoticon over his shoulder, but otherwise didn't explain.

A very confused Axton got back to his feet, and slowly walked over to the doorway. Zer0 jumped off of the far balcony, and disappeared into the streets of Sanctuary.

"I think that went well," Axton said, and shrugged. He could wait.

\--

He waited for six hours.

Most of the time had been spent trying to call Zer0 on the ECHOnet and ask if he was coming back that night, and maybe if he'd reconsider. And some of the time had been spent eating, showering, imagining Zer0's warm-but-not-that-warm insides sliding up and down on his dick.

Then, Zer0 had suddenly just...appeared. Axton jumped, nearly falling off his lookout on Zer0's too-long alien bed.

"Holy shit, dude, you do not need to sneak up on me like that. Nearly gave me a heart attack, kid."

"I apologize," he said.

"But surprising you is fun," an identical voice spoke from the doorway.

"Now disrobe, soldier."

Several things happened at once. A second Zer0, solid and physically identical to the first, let the door close and lock behind him. The first Zer0 pushed a stunned Axton backwards, watching him pop right back up in surprise. Moonshots rocked Sanctuary. Axton fumbled with his shirt zipper. Something exploded downstairs.

"Wai-wait, I thought you said something about a hologram," Axton spluttered, face bright red. "This is not a hologram!" He pressed a firm hand against the nearer Zer0's chest to show that, no, he was definitely solid. And he'd just watched the second one open and close a door. Holograms couldn't do that, he was pretty sure.

"I thought that you said something about wishing for two of me," the Zer0 closer to the door spoke. "I found a way."

"But, how--"

"Patricia Tannis."

"And the use of a class mod."

"And Eridium."

Axton swallowed. "How did you manage to get her help for something like...this?"

"I, or we, promised. We are going to make you scream. She wanted to hear."

Axton had to cover his face with one big hand. Tannis wanting to overhear sexcapades was nothing new; Axton being overheard was also nothing to note. But Zer0 actually suggesting something so lewd in such a nonchalant tone of voice set his blood on edge, made his blush reach the tips of his ears.

"The mod allows my body to become fragmented. I am simply accompanying two spaces, two bodies, at once. It requires mental effort, but not enough to worry either of us. I was told there may be some side effects. I have already seen a few on my own. For one, I am lighter by almost half." The Zer0 near the door stepped forward and held out a hand for Axton to take.

"That would make sense, considering the way we are split," the second Zer0 added. "But we are still the same, we are just one person. Once the mod is removed, I will condense back into one form, and have memories from both perspectives."

"Okay, okay," Axton huffed, marvelling at Zer0's light, warm hand. "Enough sciency shit, all I gotta know is there's two of you complete babes, I can lift you both at the same damn time, and my dick hurts from thinkin' about this all day." He dropped Zer0's hand and ripped off his boots, his socks coming away with them.

"Eloquent," one of them muttered, and the other one nudged the muddy boots with his foot.

"Look, just, get on the bed. one of you. I didn't think this part though," Axton said, and threw off his shirt.

A few new scars shone on his chiseled torso, Zer0 noted, but said nothing. One of them nodded, and sat cross-legged on the bed.

"Lay down, babe, I said I was gonna take this off you," Axton reminded him.

The Zer0 on the bed projected a blush; the standing Zer0 showed a wide smile. The now-blushing Zer0 followed directions, trying not to splay his wiry form too wide and knock Axton off of the mattress.

Axton carefully took one hand at a time and slid off the gloves, then stood and walked to the end of the bed to repeat the process with Zer0's boots. He stayed there for a moment to grasp one of Zer0's alien feet, gently squeezing his toes and laughing when Zer0 squirmed in place. He then put one knee on either side of Zer0's calves and crawled his way up Zer0's lanky body. He had to use both hands to fumble the top of the zipper open, but finally managed to get the zip between his teeth and drag it slowly down Zer0's chest.

"I was not sure why humans found this erotic," the Zer0 laying below Axton confessed, "until you did it."

Axton chuckled, still pulling. He stopped just at the beginning of Zer0's flat stomach, and then kissed between the zipper teeth. His lips found cool, pale skin, each kiss drawing a soft gasp out of Zer0. It crackled through his helmet, but Axton found the little noises endearing. He nipped between kisses, making Zer0 jump and shiver the first few times. He quickly adapted, and arched his back up into Axton's mouth. The strange curved planes of muscle under Zer0's suit tightened and stretched as Axton sucked a purple mark into Zer0's flesh.

The Zer0 they had left standing crouched beside the bed, running his ungloved fingers through Axton's hair. The smile had faded, replaced with another cute heart emote.

Axton tugged the zip further down, stopping for kisses every few inches. He planted one just above Zer0's already relaxing slit, and ran his tongue from bottom to top for good measure.

Zer0 made an interesting purring noise in his throat and turned his head to get a better view of what Axton's mouth was doing to him. When the tip of Axton's rough tongue dipped barely inside of his slit and touched the head of his hardening cock, he growled and nearly kicked Axton in an effort to spread his legs wide.

"Helmet...off," Zero gasped, clawing at the sides until he'd popped it open and pulled it away from his skull. The screen went blank, and he turned his red, thin eyes back towards Axton. All four of them followed Axton's forefinger, which dipped into Zer0's delicate slit and pressed down, deep, curling and uncurling in his slick.

"That good for you, sweetheart?" Axton rumbled, finally getting into his element.

Zer0 made another interesting noise, this one more like a whine.

Axton nodded. "And you, babe, wanna grab the usual stuff?"

The clothed Zer0 nodded, stood, and walked over to his metal desk. He opened a side drawer, and pulled out a new tube of lube.

"Is this all you'd like? You left some belongings here, if you wanted them."

"Oh shit, how many toys you still got stuffed in that drawer?"

"A set of handcuffs, ball gag, vibrator, blindfold. You're a filthy man." Zer0 crackled.

"Bring over that vibe for me, babe. Thank you."

Clothed Zer0 sighed, and handed Axton the device shaped not unlike a huge bullet.

"This is goin' in you later," Axton said with a cheeky wink. "And by that I mean like, you-you, not him-you. It's goin' in him-you right now."

The Zer0 beneath him opened his slender lips in a low moan. He pulled Axton down for a kiss, his body still moving around the finger deep inside of him. As their lips touched, Zer0's thin, gentle mandibles held Axton's chin in place like a pair of flexible fingers. Axton couldn't back away even if he wanted to.

He didn't want to pull away. He pressed himself close, tasting Zer0's sweet, strange mouth. Little fangs threatened to cut his lips and a cordlike tongue snaked against his own, and he couldn't want it any other way. He groaned and pushed their faces together so hard he could feel his nose bending to the side, trying to kiss harder, contact more, taste more deeply, catch Zer0's little moans. 

And then they pulled apart, breathless and hazy.

The cool tip of the vibrator slid past Zer0's slit, making him gasp and clench his fingers in the sheets.

"There you go, kid. Relax, it'll warm up quick." And with that, he started it up.

Zer0's toes curled, and this time he did kick Axton. He lifted one leg high enough to hook it around Axton's waist, the other one sticking out to the side and spreading himself wide.

Axton laughed gently and touched this Zer0's face for a moment before turning back to the Zer0 who'd been waiting.

"Okay buddy, your turn. Climb up here, let me take care of you too." He patted the bed next to him.

Clothed Zer0 found a place on the thin bed, and with a little pushing, wedged himself between the wall and his twin.

"Hold this," Axton instructed, and placed Zer0's hand on the base of the vibrator his double was currently thrusting into himself.

This Zer0 helped Axton peel his jumpsuit off and throw it to the floor, joining the growing pile of clothes, boots, and gloves. His helmet popped off with a hiss and a clatter, the inside of the visor dark with steamy breath.

"Is your only plan to use your old vibrator and not use your dick?" Zer0 asked, eyes tight with suspicion.

"No, no, just gotta get you all ready for the main course," Axton drawled, waving one hand. "You don't just get it up and stick it in, gotta do some foreplay."

Zer0 gave him a look, and then let go of his double's vibrator. The Zer0 still halfway in his suit scrambled for it, and tucked it back inside with a wet squelch.

Axton repeated the motion from earlier, now on all fours above both Zer0s. He leaned down and nudged the unbothered Zer0 with his tongue, lapping at his unopened slit.

"Come on, baby," he muttered, kissing the muscled opening. "Let me see the goods."

Zer0 threw back his head, and Axton felt another blush rising in his face. The sight of two darling alien babes with their eyes closed, mouths wide, gasping and grabbing the sheets made his cock twitch heavily between his thighs. This had to end soon or the heat in his stomach and his head would fry him alive, he was sure.

"You tell me when you want it, baby. I'm gonna eat you out," he growled, digging his fingertips into Zer0's hip. Arousal curled in his gut like a waiting predator. "Beautiful, damn," he whispered against Zer0's quickly relaxing slit.

Zer0 used two fingers to spread himself. Axton sighed at the sight, and ducked his head to work at the tip of Zer0's half-hard cock. It filled in his mouth, sending shivers through his body. The shaft always surprised Axton - it seemed almost too thick for his lanky body because of the thick texture ridging the underside. Each bump was soft, fleshy, and caught wonderfully on Axton's lip as he bobbed his head. The beginnings of a knot began to bulge at the base, which Axton happily swallowed down as well. The pointed tip nudged wetly at the back of his throat, long and pointed and wonderfully alien in Axton's mouth. He moaned around the shaft, and Zer0 echoed him.

Moonshots hit Sanctuary again, and the shaking made Axton swallow, hard. Zer0 grabbed his hair for a moment, not sure if he wanted to steady Axton or thrust up into him.

Once the moonshots stopped, the dick popped out of Axton's mouth and slapped wetly on Zer0's stomach.

"Okay, I need both of you, someone's gettin' fucked and I'm suckin' the other one off," Axton announced, loudly. "Come here," he pointed, motioning the Zer0 with the vibrator closer to the edge of the bed. "And you gotta stand again, sorry buddy."

The very wet Zer0 blushed and nodded, climbing to his feet. "I understand."

Axton lifted the Zer0 beneath him and groped the almost rubbery flesh of his ass, massaging him and spreading the slit with his thumbs. He confiscated the vibrator and turned it off, throwing it somewhere in the sheets.

"Okay sweetie," he moaned, and after a quick gob of lube smeared across his shaft, he pressed into the slit just under Zer0's cock.

"O-oh," Zer0 gasped, shivering. "You didn't tell me it was going to feel tingly."

"That's just the lube, babydoll. I can always put more on if you like it."

Zer0 nodded, his whole body beginning to tense under Axton's long, slow thrusts. "I like it, thank you."

Axton blushed for the third time that day. The cute act? Well, it kinda did it for him. And Zer0 was nothing if not strangely cute.

He motioned the second Zer0 over and expectantly opened his mouth. Instead of the girthy dick he expected, Zer0's mouth covered his own for a possessive kiss. The tiny mandibles held Axton's face, and he let Zer0 take charge.

This kiss felt so different from the first, with Zer0's small, three-fingered hands cupping Axton's head and his thin tongue poking between Axton's lips. His little fangs brushed over Axton's bottom lip, drawing a fat bead of blood and a muffled gasp. Zer0 lapped it up and continued kissing, groaning against Axton's mouth.

When they finally pulled away, Axton's hair stuck messily to the side and his lip still bled. A thin line of blood swelled up, and Zer0 pecked it with a kiss.

"Sorry," Zer0 muttered against his lips.

"You're fine, babe. Still wanna suck your cock though." Axton winked, disheveled and still gently moving his hips.

"That can happen," Zer0 replied. He hadn't quite figured out how to wink back yet, but he did close two eyes for a moment in a reasonable attempt.

He grasped Axton's hair and pushed his head down, feeling lips against his dripping cock and sucking in a gentle breath.

Axton sucked Zer0's cock into his mouth all the way down to the knot in one smooth motion. Shifting his hips, he rocked himself between the Zer0 below him and the Zer0 in front of him. He pulled away, and then rocked back and stuck his tongue neatly in Zer0's slit. He grasped Zer0's slender hips hard enough to bruise, and sucked at the opening. Salty-sweet fluid stained his chin, and he licked the warm, soft insides with a forceful tongue.

Zer0 lifted his leg and bent his knee, making the loose slit pucker open around Axton's tongue. He half-kneeled on the end of the bed, tossing his head back and thrusting against Axton's tongue.

Axton scrabbled in the bedsheets blindly until he found the vibrator again, and tucked it next to the Zer0 he was still lazily fucking into the mattress. His left hand brushed against the Zer0 below him, and he casually scooped his cock up and rubbed it with his sticky palm.

"Let me, uhnn... Let me try," Zer0 gasped between thrusts. He pushed Axton's face away from his double's crotch, and guided the dripping cock down to his own mouth.

"O-oh my fucking god," Axton breathed, stilling for a moment to watch ridge after ridge slide into Zer0's mouth and into his waiting throat. "God fucking damn..."

Zer0's mandibles slid over his double's knot, the tips rubbing around it in little circles. He swallowed around the head, massaging with his long tongue and soft lips.

In a moment of inspiration, Axton grabbed the vibrator, wiped it off on the sheets, and lubed it up. He then pressed it into the half-kneeling Zer0's slit, and turned the switch on.

Zer0 immediately moaned and wrenched Axton's head up for another kiss.

Something smashed into the Sanctuary shields, and another, and another. Another round of moonshots already?

The vibrations hummed through Axton's body, ripping a moan from his throat and making his cock jitter inside Zer0's body. It must have affected both of them as well, because toes curled and fingers tightened.

"My final warning: this is going to be too much. Please, let me finish," Zer0 whimpered into the kiss.

"Of course, baby, of course, you gonna cum for me? For us?"

The Zer0 below them took the hint, and pressed himself all the way to the base. His mandibles locked behind the rapidly expanding knot, and he struggled to swallow. The feeling of Axton rocking against him while jerking him off, insides tingling with strange lube and throat full of textured, knotted dick... He came, shuddering, his own knot filling easily and catching on Axton's rough palm.

Axton felt the aftereffects; the slit below him gushed with thick fluid, making his cock slip easily in and out. He watched Zer0's cum dribble out around the knot in the other Zer0's mouth, cheeks bulging obscenely and throat obviously full.

The sight alone made Axton's stomach curl tight, his orgasm hitting him like a punch. He came with a sharp growl, coating Zer0's slit and the bottom of his cock in hot splashes of white cum. He thrust until he was spent, the Zer0 below him whimpering and throwing his head to the side in overstimulated bliss.

"Damn," he finally sighed, collapsing. "That was fucking...fucking...hot..."

When the dick finally slipped back out of his mouth, the Zer0 below him took a loud breath and swallowed whatever cum was left. The kneeling Zer0 turned off the vibrator and clambered bonelessly on the bed, letting himself fall to the side and splay his limbs, exhausted.

The moonshots finally ended, and Axton blew a kiss to the sky.

"Gotta give Jack some credit for that one," he sighed. "Man just gave me the best orgasm of my life. Maybe I should call and thank him."

Both Zer0s groaned.


End file.
